Make Mine Mike

One of the personal trainers at my gym nodded at me while I was struggling and straining with the self-mutilation machine on low setting. Then he told his new client, "This guy is the most intense person working out here."

He later said he admired how I worked hard when I was there, something he tries to get all his clients to do. I appreciated the comment -- inspiring that kind of dedication is what he does for a living -- he himself runs a marathon every other month. But I just said, "Ahh, I make it look tougher than it is by grunting a lot."

In fact, the other day, I got on the seated row station, grabbed the bar, expecting resistance, but instead, fell into a backward somersault. Someone had taken out the pin since my last set, leaving no weights. Everybody in the gym laughed at me or asked if I was okay. "Man, those weights get lighter and lighter with every workout," I said.

All kidding aside, when I got back my running photos, I had to tell myself: Jeez, dude, you can try to be strong and fast, but do you gotta look so koorayzay?