Make Mine Mike

For a while, I had it good. My fiancee decided we needed to eat healthier. My grilled steaks and pasta dishes were too heavy, so if we were going to watch what we ate, well, she would watch would we ate. She took over in the kitchen.

Thanks to her new favorite menu guru, Hungry Girl. Adelphia even went to a book signing and met Lisa Lillien, the Hungry Girl herself, and came home with her autographed copy, announcing, "I am going to make every single recipe in this book!"

And she started to do so. I was kicked out of the kitchen -- fine by me -- even if it meant lighter dishes, as long as I wasn't slaving over a hot stove...

The desserts were pretty good too. I started getting addicted to snacks like the low-calorie peanut butter chocolate bread pudding. So when I asked Adelphia to make the chocolate cherry muffins, and she said she was too tired to get the ingredients, I figured okay, I'll go pick 'em up. While I was at it, she said, I might as well grind up the high-fiber cereal for her -- I'm good at that -- oh, and could I use my strong manly arms to mix it up in a bowl for her...

You see where this is going, right?

I loved the way she said that my batch of pastries came out better than hers, that I had a knack for it.

Last night, I made some kind of cupcakes called Death by Chocolate. Adelphia tried the first one and raved about how moist and delicious they were -- buttering me up to keep me baking. But after I took a bite, I realized I wasn't just being sweet-talked.

Yeah, I still got it good.